A Hymn For Me

O self, myself
In unimpressive wonder
Consider all
Alone, thy hand hath made
You’ll feel the scars
You’ll see the waste and plunder
No pow’r throughout
Your universe displayed

Then cries my soul
Without your Saviour, see
How small thou art
How small thou art
Then cries my soul
Without your Saviour, see
How small thou art
How small thou art

An Army of Paper Saints

At lunchtime on Thursday, I was skimming on facebook when I IM’d Eva, a cowriter of mine in Houston. We recently started working on a song, and I’ve been pretty remiss in working on it. I wanted to tell her I’ve been thinking about it, which I have, but to be honest, not that much.

In the process of the conversation, I told her I had another idea for a worship song. No title, not even a hook; Only an idea.

The idea is coming together in authenticity. Real with one another in the Church. Maybe that doesn’t sound like a new idea, but I’ve been feeling led to write it.

I love working with Eva. She’s a walking, talking, emailing vessel of the Holy Spirit. We bounced a few ideas back and forth and she said she’d pray about it and write down some ideas.

At that moment I had a thought and typed two words in the box and hit send “Paper Saints”.

She replied, “tell me about that. I replied something like, ”not real saints, just 2 dimensional cut-outs of what a saint is supposed to look like“.

She started a file and just before I went back to work, I typed this into the file:

We come with needs unspoken
for fear of being exposed
And though the circle be unbroken
we unfold into an army of paper saints.

That evening, I sat at he piano and started playing around.. 5 minutes later I had a chorus. I went online and opened the file. She had copied my im onto the page and had started a verse.

I started typing.. she came online and she started praying.. then the words flowed, and by Friday morning, most of the lyric was done. I went in the studio on Saturday morning.. and by the next day we had a work tape done.

I gotta tell you, when the Holy Spirit is on board, writing the song’s just a matter of holding the pen, laying your hand on the keyboard, and most importantly, getting out of the way.

If you’d like to give it a listen, you can check it out here.

The Challenge of "WHY?"

I was driving to an early call-time last Sunday morning.. Before sunrise. Dark-thirty. I flipped on the radio.. NPR.. talk-interview show. Some guy was explaining his take on the meaning of life. Between my thoughts of “I need coffee” and “where am I?”, I started listening to the conversation. The guy was saying, “...the important question to ask and answer about anything you do is, ‘Why?’ ”

Now, unless you’ve never contemplated the meaning of life before, you know this is the pertinent question. I’ve asked it many times as I sat down to plan. The 5 year plan. The career plan. The family plan.. The house plan...

It’s important, I get it.

But in the middle of my pompous, eye-rolling-head-nod, it suddenly dawned on me that in many areas of my life I had gone a long time without revisiting that question.

Why do I work where I work? Why do I do what I do? Why do I live where I live? Why? Why? Why?

Sure, I asked these questions at critical times when I started my job, nurtured my job skills, was house-hunting, etc.

It rarely occurs to me that I need to revisit those areas (and other areas) and ask the question again.

In Michigan, there are many people who are having to ask these questions again, out of necessity. In other words, the are looking for new jobs, careers, and houses.. because they lost the ones they had.

For myself, I still have a job, a career, a house.. but are the reasons I chose them still the same as today’s reasons?

Answer: NO!

Time to re-evaluate.. in fact, its always time to re-evaluate... actually, maybe its the wrong word... The word evaluate indicates something that can be accomplished, and I’m beginning to wonder if the process is much more dynamic than I ever assumed..


Use me while you can.

Normal vs. Paranormal? Natural vs. Miraculous?

I was reading today a quote that said there is nothing paranormal except our limited knowledge of nature. That’s what the quote said..

I can relate to that statement because of an experience I had a few years ago.

You may remember an asteroid belt that ended up flying through our atmosphere a few years back. Many got up and laid outside in the early morning to watch it go through the atmosphere.

I was driving about 5 miles south of my house, in broad daylight, when something caught my eye to the left. I turned my head in time to see a fireball in the sky. Thing is, it appeared to be the size of the Sun (my perspective).

But this was not normal.. it was paranormal. Here’s why. It was high in the atmosphere, so it was quite large, but it was moving across the sky as if it were a jet 200 feet above the ground.

It lasted 2 seconds at most.. took 2 seconds to fly from the horizon on my left to the horizon on my right. So fast, in fact, that by the time everyone in the car looked it was gone.

My idea of normal was shattered. It laid in pieces on the floor of that minivan.

Seriously, Up to this time, the nearest I’d come to Paranormal was Teflon®. (I mean, how is that surface dry yet feel wet? It has to dry out eventually, right? Just sayin’...)

As a Christian I’ve heard (and talked) about miraculous things all my life. Friends who are healed from a non-operable cancer. People who testify of an Angel’s presence who led them through a mind-field. Miraculous circumstances that freed people from prison.

All those things. You know, when we feel God’s presence. We ‘see’ Him working in people’s lives.

But Paranormal? Physical aberrations that seem impossible? Something you can touch? Aren’t these things paranormal? Why don’t these miraculous things of the faith amaze me.. humble me.. bring me to my knees?

Have I become numb to the supernatural, because its not paranormal? I’ve realized that I’m pretty much still a skeptic to these things. I’m a Thomas. A doubter. Do people really see these things? Are they using them as a way to make their story more significant or impacting? Were those people really healed or just misdiagnosed to begin with.

Even as I write this I have a fear coursing through my arm that people are going to be disappointed in me for expressing these feelings... that I’m somehow not holding up my end of the story. I’m not trusting in what people tell me, or that I’m denying the working, maybe even the existence of God.

I don’t. I know what I know. I feel what I feel. I’m a witness to his miraculous hand in my life and others... but unless I remind myself that those things I know, feel, and witness are not natural, ordinary things, I begin to classify them as normal, and they become something I take for granted, or worse something I don’t even recognize as the hand of God working in my life and the life of others.

Then I see a fireball the size of a football field rocket 1,000 miles in 2 seconds and realize how small I am in this unbelievable, ordered creation and I realize that there is nothing miraculous except my limited knowledge of God’s omnipotent hand at the wheel of His creation. My limited recognition of His incomprehensible love for us and His desire to have us be an integral part of its fruition.

Took It For Granted

I’ve been waking up multiple times during the night. (and its not because I drank too much water before bed)

I’ve been waking up with lines and couplets. Ideas and rhymes. A few nights ago I woke up and thought, that’s a great idea. I’ll remember that. I didn’t even need to get up and write it down, it was that good. Good thing, because I was at a hotel and I didn’t have my notepad next to me..

I forgot the idea by the time I woke up again.

Try as I might, I’m still lamenting the loss of that idea. Moleskin is back in place. Recorder is at the ready. Its been awhile since the thoughts bubbled. Now they boil at times.

I’m thankful they’re back and I will try to be prepared. Hit me, Lord. Hit me!